The Toaster Oven Prophecy
by CaptainClipy
Summary: A collab with RaikouAwesome1234 brings you a story of two Clans, both equally different. One, an incredibly serious Clan that enjoys the isolation from the rest of the world, and another, which is unbearably random in every imaginable way. When the two Clans meet each other, will they be able to live with one another, or will all that is sane in the world fall? Skateboards.
1. Prologue

RA1234: Hello, everybody! And welcome to my first collab. WITH CAP'N CLIPY HIMSELF...I stink with coming up with names, mind you. SO IF ANY OF THESE ARE BAD, FORGIVE ME. *facepalms* And all of these locations are completely made up, cuz these are DIFFERENT CLANS! And Clipy, anything to say?

CLIPEH: Yeh, howdy. *Messily devours random crab apple*

* * *

Copperstar stepped onto a stone dividing the Sacred Hollow from Clan territory. He was on his way to the Moonpool that fair night. What he didn't know was that this night would change his life forever.

With one more leap, Copperstar jumped off the final stone and pushed through the lichen branch hanging from the rocks above, separating the Sacred Hollow from the outside world. The familiar scent of lavender hit his scent glands.

Copperstar looked up. He saw the moon nearly at the top of the sky, so he'd arrived just in time. If the moon was not reflected on the surface of the Moonpool, you would not see StarClan.

The pool came into view at the eastern edge of the cavern. The Moonpool consisted of a shallow hole, a ring of stones surrounding it, and a tiny waterfall flowing out of the side of the rock.

Copperstar sat down on the largest rock and quietly dipped his nose in the water. When bitter numbness overtook him and he almost fell asleep, the sound of whispers surrounded him.

The copper-colored leader opened his eyes to find himself on a large cliff overlooking a wide expanse of mountains. A valley cut through the undisturbed rock, where clumps of bramble and a few stunted trees lay.

"Hello, Copperstar."

Copperstar turned to see a gray cat with sleek long fur and blue eyes. It was his deceased grandfather.

"Salutations, Graycloud." the Clan leader dipped his head to his kin.

Graycloud twitched his whiskers with amusement. "Ah, young one, how many times have I said you don't have to treat me with such respect? I get enough of it already."

Copperstar shrugged. "I apologize, Graycloud, it is simply tradition."

Graycloud purred and settled down on the rock beside Copperstar. "Now Copperstar, do you know why we are here?"

"No."

"This is the place where new friends will come from." Graycloud said, nodding at a large clump of bramble in the valley. "They will have fled their home for the most random reason possible, and will seek refuge in the highlands."

Copperstar frowned. "But Graycloud, WoodClan has been undisturbed for generations!"

"Yes, but maybe it is time you find out that there are...others, and not all of them are like you." Graycloud blinked and began to fade.

"W-wait, tell me more!" Copperstar said. "Who are they? What are they? What-" Copperstar trailed off. Graycloud faded till only his eyes remained, then they were gone.

Copperstar blinked and was suddenly awake on the side of the Moonpool. He sighed and silently trudged away, wondering how WoodClan's medicine cat would interpret this.

* * *

RA1234: Aaaand, we're-

CWIPYY: I'd like to mention I didn't write any of this first chapter, so congratulate ze guan an onleh RaikouAwesome1234, not meh.

RA1234: *sighs* CLIPY! *says really fast so Clipy can't interrupt* And we're good! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Review, but don't flame please! Clipy, anything to say?

CLPIY: Yah, fair thee well. *Shoves candy cane up nose* Yikes, that stings going up.


	2. Chapter 1

Clipy: HELLO! Chapter two is underway! (Or chapter 1, technically speaking, seeing how last chapter was more of a prologue.) Me thinks y'all will enjoy dis one. Also, thanks for the non-existent reviews in the last chapter! They mean a lot! FOREVER ALONE... And, sorry about the delay, a little confusion and mistakes on my part. Anything to say, Raikou?

RA1234: *deafening explosion signals my arrival* Actually, Clipy, my Fanfiction persona's name is Fluffy. Cool? Cool. WARNING: You will laugh until you cry(maybe).

* * *

Thunder echoed overhead, startling about every cat in Toaster Oven Forest, except for a cat was randomly sitting on a really big tree. Like, really big. Hearing the thunder, the brown tabby tom leapt off the tree, landing into an open clearing without a scratch. Not because he was invincible or anything, but because the clearing, by some coincidence, happened to be littered in very soft bacon.

"Who left this extra-soft moisturizer bacon all over the floor?" he demanded. "Someone could get hurt!"

A truckload of kits came up to greet the cat. Seriously, a dump truck came up and a load of kits fell out.

"We're sorry, Policecar..." they apologised to the Clan deputy before scampering off to find some cool hats.

Policecar snorted in disgust.

Meanwhile, a hunting patrol had just returned to camp. They had forty-seven beetles and three crocodiles in their jaws. Along with a chesterfield.

"That's it?" Policecar asked when they had set their prey on the fresh-kill mountain. "There's usually more.."

Backpack, a senior warrior with bright purple fur, set down his crocodile and spoke to Policecar with undisguised disgust. "They prey is running short," he mewed. "This is all we could find." He flared his nostrils and sat on his crocodile.

Policecar turned to look at the massive pile of fresh-kill, a frown on his face. It must've been somewhere around hundreds of feet tall.

"So little..." he whispered.

The other cats murmured agreement. One of them even quickly wrote a three-thousand page book about how much he agreed.

Greybeard, a five-thousand year-old mottled gray tabby tom, emerged from the elders den. "Back in my day, we weren't shortening on prey!" he rasped. "I remember, back in the day, Hairychest came up to me, and he said, 'Greybeard,', he said, 'would you like a hundred flamingos and seventy-hundred thousand hyenas?' And now, we only get a few hundred Crocs each a day!" he grunted before barfing out his carrot stew from the morning a day before.

Policecar, who was listening with a disapproving look on his face, shook his head. "Greybeard, you need to quit complaining. This isn't a big problem."

"No, Greybeard is right," a voice came from the warriors den. It was Breadloaf, a cream-and-cream she-cat. She bounded down to meet them. "We can't keep going on like this." she murmured.

Policecar stared at her in dismay. "Well, we can't just leave!" he argued. "This has been out home for generations! We can't leave it behind! Not to mention, Yodelheart's bowling trophy collection is here!"

Yodelheart quickly burst out to defend her bowling trophies.

"And why can't we leave?" Phoneline retorted, looking up from his beetle. "The world is a big place. There's got to be somewhere better out there..." his voice trailed off and he looked at his paws.

"If we leave here, we'll be leaving everything we've ever known behind.." Cutelilmouse mewed quietly, shuffling her paws.

"And is that necessarily a bad thing?" the voice came from a tall, black tom with molted brown and orange spots. "We all know how hesitant your ancestors were when choosing to live in this place."

Breadloaf gasped. "Are-are you Sol? The legendary cat?" she asked with awe.

The tom looked surprised. "Me? No, I'm Nigel, Sol's bro." he replied casually.

"Oh." Breadloaf sat back down again.

"Well, what do you want?" Policecar asked, lashing his tail at the stranger.

"I have only come to offer a suggestion about your 'leaving predicament.'" Nigel responded calmly.

"You have nothing we want, spy!" a cat from the edge of the crowd - Elephantclaw - hissed.

Nigel raised his bushy eyebrows. "Would you listen to me if I offered you a cookie?" he asked.

Elephantclaw hesitated. "...Is it chocolate chip?"

"Yes."

"Go ahead, friend, speak away." Elephantclaw purred once cookies had been given. "What were you saying? Something intriguing, I presume." he sat down and rested his tail over his paws.

Nigel cleared his throat. "I am a traveler," he began. "I have seen and heard many things."

"Wow! How interesting!" Elephantclaw meowed over a mouthful of cookie. "Go on."

Nigel shot the cat a glance that probably meant, 'dude... what?' or something along those lines. He continued. "I know of a place where you cats can hunt and frolic in pretty meadows in peace."

"And...?" Policecar wasn't having any of this.

"I thought you might want to take a look..." he meowed, something unreadable glinting in his eyes as he took a bite of extra-moisturizer bacon.

* * *

CWIPPY: YEEEAH! That was really fun. :DDDD .3. .3. :3 :P xD xP XDDD OvO O.O ...Anything to add, Raikou? *Trollface*

RA1234: My NAME is Fluffy, Clipy. *random pineapple* JUST TAH MENTION, I WROTE LIKE, ONE SENTENCE IN THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER. EVERYTING ELSE WUZ WRITTEN BY ZEE GUAN AND ONLEH CAP'N CLIPY. *shoves bag of Cap'n Crunch in Clipy's face* EAT CEREAL!

CWIPPY: SURE. I DIDNT HAVE MY BREAKFAST ANYWAY. *Swipes cereal* THANK YOU KINDLY, YOU COMPUTER MONITOR.

Fluffy: Uh-huh. REVIEW PLEZ, YOU LOWLY PLEBEIAN, DON'T FLAME OR I'LL CRY AND DIE! QAQ XD *deafening explosion signals my departure*

 **Flaming ain't cool. #NuhFlaming**


	3. Chapter 2

CLIPEGH: SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT! I'm just really spoopid. DD: But here's another chapter. Please review? xc Also this chapter is written by meeeee.

FLUFFEH: HI :3 It isn't all Clipy's fault for the delay. CONFUSION ON BOTH OUR PARTS *stares at Pokemon CoroCoro leak*

* * *

Policecar groaned as he stubbed his toe on a toy Hotwheels car imbedded in the ground of the massive field. The entire had been traveling for about three minutes, without food or sleep, trying to find this supposed paradise. Policecar wasn't taking this well.

"I swear, if I don't find an alligator soon, I'm going to eat Greybeard."

Greybeard squealed in alarm and hid under his shell - because Greybeard had a shell. It actually looked almost identical to Bowser's shell, from Super Mario.

"Jk, Greybeard," a slightly wingless tom with light purple fur meowed. "He wouldn't eat you," then he said, "You're too skinny."

"Oi!" Greybeard meowed in a British accent (that he seemed to have at random times). "At least I have four legs!"

A three-legged she-cat called Fuldamobilpaw burst into tears.

"Das not cool, man." Kentuckyfriedchicken croaked.

"Sorreh."

"It's whatevs, bruh." Fuldamobilpaw cried in Richard Kiely's voice for some reason.

"How distinguishable." Nigel meowed from the front of the line as he brushed his teeth.

"Silence, fool!" Phoneline hissed, who had been getting more and more cautious about this strange cat.

"Uh, would you like me to fetch the medicine cat?" Breadloaf asked.

"Fluffymint?" Whiterabbit said. "She's busy searching for Raikous. Haven't the faintest idea what those are, but, you know, medicine cat business.

"PTTTHHHHH!" Breadloaf spitted for reasons unknown.

About a whole minute later, they had reached the line of trees.

"Art fart," Nigel commented, staring at the looming branches of the forest. Then he entered, and the others followed slowly.

But Mistletoe, a queen, hesitated, grabbing her kits, Groggykit, Mjölnirkit and Fedorakit, and protecting them with her fifty-foot-long tail.

"It's scawwy!" the queen whined.

Groggykit rolled his eyes.

Gandalfisawesomeclaw snorted. "Lawl, wittle miss kitty cat is a wittle worried."

Then Mistletoe grabbed Gandalfisawesomeclaw's throat and dropkicked him into the distance.

"Hmph!" Mistletoe said.

"I wonder why we are always so low on warriors?" Elephantclaw commented as they entered, genuinely curious.

"I know, right?" Breadloaf agreed.

They wandered through the forest, when a question hit Policecar.

"Where's our leader?"

Then they saw Clipehstar - aka the most awesome - enter from the clearing, tears in his eyes. "You left meh!" he cried.

"Oooooh, sorry m8." Nigel said.

"S'all right, man."

They continued.

"Hang on," Policecar said, another question hitting him, like a flyswatter or something. "Nigel, how did you know of this place? You seriously didn't walk the entire way there and back, right?"

"Yeah!" Clipehstar said. "What up wi' tha'?

"Naw," Nigel said, digging into his bag that he had now. "I saw it on Google Maps." He held up his iPhone 6s.

"Oh," Clipehstar said. "I should have guessed."

"Yeah," Nigel said. "You should have!" his eyes were burning pink and rainbow, clearly unimpressed. Then he turned away, continued walking.

Clipehstar shook himself and followed the loner, his majestic Clan not far behind him.

"Not far now," Nigel reported after a while.

"That's what you said thirty seconds ago!" Breadloaf whined.

"SHADDAP!" Nigel glared at Breadloaf from over his shoulder. "Siristar does not lie." he turned back to his iPhone 6s. "Siristar, what is it like ahead?"

"CERTAINLY, LonersAreDaBoss43." Siristar, the automated voice-command program that came with every iOS thing nowadays said. "HERE ARE THE WALMARTS OF YOUR AREA." Nigel face-pawed.

"No, Siristar," he mewed. "I asked for a map of the area. MAP OF THE AREA!"

"OK." Siristar said. "HERE IS THE SONG LIST OF ALBUM: Ocean Eyes, BY "OWL CITYPAW"."

Suddenly, the absolutely legendary medicine cat riding a Raikou called Fluffymint appeared. The medicine cat's name was Fluffymint, not the Raikou. "DID SOMEBODY SAY OWLCITYPAW?!" she cried before disappearing in a puff of smoke, sending catmint flying over the area.

Nigel sighed, totally ignoring the chaos of five seconds ago. he stopped dead to give Siristar a piece of his mind. "I don't want your stupid songs!" he hissed.

The entire Clan gasped. "Did... did you just call Owl Citypaw's songs stupid?" one cat said.

"Yah." Nigel said. "They're all the same."

"Get 'im, lads!" Phoneline yowled, and every cat tackled Nigel - except for Youropinionsuxclaw - causing Nigel to drop his phone as he fell to the ground.

Once the smoke cleared, Policecar watched Nigel stumble to his feet. "It was perfectly reasonable," Nigel said quickly, before Policecar could apologize. "I would have done the same if anyone said that about my favorite music artist."

Policecar nodded briskly.

"For the record," Clipehstar said. "Owl Citypaw's songs are always uber original."

"I agree!" Fluffymint chirped.

Nigel slowly limped to fetch his cracked phone. "Now, Siristar," he croaked. "I just want a map of the area."

It took a moment, but finally, Siristar said, "SORRY, LonersAreDaBoss43, I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, 'NOT SILLY STAR I MUST FAWN A NAP OF THE'."

It was a gruesome battle, but as the Clan continued through the forest, a triumphant Nigel in front, they left behind the crumpled body of Nigel's iSiristar app (which he had somehow managed to rip out of his phone), who, as they left, whispered in a broken voice, "OK, LonersAreDaBoss43, HERE IS A MAP OF THE AREA."

* * *

CwiPPY: LAUGH AT MY FUNNINESS! XDD XD Gud. Did you enjoy? I know one of you mortals out there must have. It's your programming. Anything to say, my dear Raikou- I mean, Fluffy? :3

:3FWUFFY: Hallelujah, Clipy used meh name! *explodes* Then there was The Bite of '87. Yeah..i-it's amazing how the human body can survive without teh frontal lobe, y'know? FNAF FTW X3


End file.
